Direction. I
feel like I have come to a point in my life that I need more
guidance. I am a 29 year old receptionist. Not that there is anything
wrong with the job that I have, but I expected to have finished
collage by now married and had a kid. Well I am partially there. I am
engaged to my boyfriend of 11 years and we have a beautiful little
girl who is now 5 years old. He is also a student a Chemistry major
at that very intelligent, but juggling school and work at the same
time as well as trying to raise a child is hard work. Parenting is a
full time job all on it's own.
As parents
we are constantly trying not to mess up our children permanently.
Myself growing up had a horrible childhood. I guess I am just in
panic because I have come so far and trying not to mess up my little
girl the way my parents did to me. Although I am not on drugs and
drinking my self into a coma thinking it will fix everything I am
trying to work hard and keep everything together for my daughter. I
want her to look at me with respect knowing when she reaches a
certain age her mom did everything in her power to educate her and to
raise her right! My fiance and I work very hard to make sure she gets
everything she needs in life. To start off with she has two parents
whom love her very much and will do anything to see her happy. We as
a family are truly blessed to have one another he keeps me strong
when I am down and I in turn do the same for him. Our little girl
will come home with questions about our relationship. There are not
to many kids in her class who have both of their parents together.
Right now we are trying to prepare her for kindergarten this fall.
But goes back to me and the hubby's schedule another juggling act we
will soon have to prepare for. Since when did kindergarten only do
less than half a day? This is insane how are we as working parents
suppose to be able to work full time to support our family and manage
the fact school isn't even a full time deal anymore?
I am not sure
if I had mentioned this in my previous post but I am fallowing my
dream and trying to become a published writer. So when I am not
working and have free time I am writing. Just about anything and
everything that comes to mind. Not that I needed to add anything
else to my crazy plate of life with working and my family. I am
trying to not lose myself an wanted to do something that I love while
I had down time that wouldn't cost me anything. Being parents we are
always trying to budget and trying to find things to do that wont
cost us to much. Just so happens I love to write and have this crazy
dream of some day walking up to a store and finding someone buying
something I poured my heart and soul into. So for now because I am
trying my damnedest not to screw my child up I swear not to drink
away my issues with anything but coffee and try to set a good
example of fallowing your dreams no matter how silly they may seem to
someone else.
Life is
hard and is always testing us. So I am trying to keep positive and
know that all our craziness will die down and pay off for our family
one day. No Matter how hard life gets I will always be grateful for
my loving little family of 3.
P.s. No matter
how old we are everyone needs a little guidance every now and then.
What appears to look perfect from the outside is not always the case.
We all have our troubles but it is learning how to deal with them in
a healthy constructive manner!
Annie.
No comments:
Post a Comment